Working with couples is dear to my heart.  I know how much is at stake and how important immediate results are. During times of high conflict and stress, or after events that are considered and experienced as a “deal breaker”, it is most important to interrupt destructive patterns of interaction, and begin to replace them with positive and constructive ones.

First we will identify what you need to see change -- in yourself, in your partner, in your lives, in your relationship. Then we will focus on concrete skills, such as “active listening”, “time outs”, “soft start-ups”, and establishing “rituals” and habits to support and enhance your relationship. We will take into consideration your specific needs and personalities. This prepares the way for you to get closer again.

I also help couples at the brink of divorce, and couples who have decided on separation, but want support and guidance in the process.

If the difficulties in your marriage result from your partner’s bipolar disorder or depression, I can help. These problems affect not only the person who is diagnosed, but also you, the spouse, though in different ways. Especially after disruptive events such as hospitalizations, manic episodes, or long drawn-out phases of depression, you might feel exhausted, hopeless, at your wit’s end -- more like a care-taker than a spouse. That’s when it is most important to act. I can help you to reestablish your relationship as equals, and to distinguish between “the person” and “the illness” so you can fight the illness as a team, rather than fight each other.